Liberation… the action of setting someone free from imprisonment, slavery, or oppression;

I have recently been woken up and slapped awake again by meeting someone who has got me questioning and seeing the limits I had placed on myself. Unknowingly, and I am unsure when I did this to myself? But I had unconsciously decided that it was better to be on my own, and that maybe my relationship days were behind me. I had stopped looking, starting dressing for comfort, and basically told myself that I would be single forever.

So there I am minding my own business…

Then BAM! this person turns up and turns my idea on it’s head. They literally got in my face and squared up to me and told me how attractive I was, how sexy I am, and how much they wanted to get to know me better… I couldn’t laugh it off, I couldn’t avoid them, I had to sit and hear it.

They literally scared me to death! How could they see this when I live in flat shoes and comfy clothes. I came up with every excuse I could think of…

“I can’t”

“I’m too…”

“What if…”

Heart racing and the fight or flight kicking in big time!

My fear and discomfort were screaming at me to ignore and carry on my life as I was. Stay inside my self made cocoon of safety and just be glad that someone nice had noticed me… It would have been the easier option.

Then I recognised the restriction I had placed on myself. And I knew however scared I was that I needed to challenge this self imposed idea and see what happened. SHIT! I had been on my own for years and here I was getting ready for a date! At 57! Bloody hell.

Needless to say I went on the date, with a man who saw me in a way I have NEVER seen myself. And it felt so good. I allowed this in… I heard the words… and I felt the joy of being desired. Not since my 20’s had this happened!

And I realised my life is not over yet, and indeed it may be just beginning. This guy had unwittingly cracked me open and I began to question myself. What else would I like to do? Where else have I restricted myself?

Now this isn’t about me meeting a man and falling in love with him…

No,

This is about him being a catalyst to wake me up and get me to fall in love with myself again! To look at my life without this restriction and see what that might look like? To LIBERATE myself to feel sexy, vibrant, desirable inspite of my being older and overweight… To feel young and alive. And to not need a man to do this for me, but for me to do this for myself.

I have been given the chance to have a new outlook on my life. Expand it. Grow it. Direct it.

To have confidence in myself. To know my worth. To feel whole and feminine again. What a gift and I feel so grateful and blessed.

So I invite you to read this and take this as your cue… What do you tell yourself? and if you were to remove this thought and liberate yourself from it how might you feel instead?

If the restriction didn’t exist how would you act and feel differently? If you were to tell yourself the opposite and believe it, would you act differently?

Liberate yourself… We only have this one life… time to live it!

I am now as giddy as a teenage… I’m looking into get a full sleeve tattoo, buy some heels, get a new hair-do, start seeing myself as a beautifully graceful and elegant attractive older lady. Full of wisdom and now open to a fuller life. Some may see this as a mid life crisis but who cares!

Yes, liberation is my new mantra… I’ll keep you posted!